This whole not-having-two-incomes is a bit stressful. Financially, we're fine; we can still live comfortably. However, we seem to keep finding things that need to be fixed around the house, so it would be awesome if we had two incomes again.

(We'll be bleeding a bit even after I start, but I plan to work my ass off and put my business in the black as soon as I can.)

It has been tempting to shop because my house is suddenly (mostly) empty. A lot of space has opened up that we didn't have to consider before. I feel like we've just moved into a new house. I can't imagine how much money people have to spend after they purchase an enormous house. Ours is a modest size, and I don't know how to fill the space. My dad also built the addition in a strange way, so the master suite is in the back of the house over the kitchen. As much as I would love to move to that room, it is inconvenient (far from everything, including the children; too many stairs; poor WiFi; strange bathroom; too warm). For now it will remain empty; I won't even use it for storage.

We also have to consider childcare in the coming months. When I return to work, I will need someone to care for the children so I can work normal hours. We are currently considering an au pair. I prefer to have a Korean au pair to maintain some continuity with my children's bilingualism and culture (food, especially). I also like the idea of being a host family. I'm not sure that my husband is on board with the idea as it does cost quite a few pennies to hire an au pair. In the end, though, we will need someone. There are certainly financial benefits of an au pair (no "nanny tax") in additional to the cultural benefits, but I wonder about the adjustment period and how stressful (or not) it may be for the children. I've done the research and am convinced that an au pair is the best route, but I'll have to convince my husband.

In a couple days, I will finally be free...